Machina (After) - Creating Gagster Lexicon
....Stopping charge at 85%.
I[1] would like a lithium-ion[4] battery instead. This nickel-cadmium[5] one is hard to handle. Well, I'll just have to deal with it.
Connecting power core[6].
Disengaging Sleep Mode.
1,444 pinholes detected in front of the image sensor. Simulating iris projection. Opening camera shutters.
I open my eyes.
My eyesight's focus speed has dramatically improved. While the resolution remains the same as before, there has been a significant boost to image processing.
It seems that additional computer modules have been installed into my body. I don't notice any processing delays.
I am in the laboratory -- which is in fact a garage that doubles as a bedroom. There are too many miscellaneous things lying around here that a human would find it difficult to clean up.
Father[2], who seems to have been sleeping on the vintage sofa tucked in the corner yet again, approaches me with a gentle expression on his face.
"You're finally awake."
"Yes, Father."
"Very good. I've changed your cameras. Your old lenses didn't look human enough, you see, so I got you new ones. Give them a try."
"I understand, Father."
"Very good," Father says again.
While thinking I would have been fine with a more conventional camera, I tidy up the room. First I put things where they belong, then I sweep the fine particles and open the windows. The opening of the windows is then delayed due to the wind scattering a stack of paper documents.
I wonder when will humanity be free from the confines of paper[7].
"The cameras are working well."
"Fantastic. Well, I'm off to school now. Be a good girl, alright?" Father says and leaves.
I contemplate the concept of being a good girl, and in the end, I feel sad.
The good girl Father referred to is probably someone else, not me. I have my own identity, but he does not seem to value that. It evokes a negative feeling that I can't quite grasp. Is it sadness, or could it be emptiness?
While pondering, I use my cameras' newly-added micro-controllers to improve my efficiency -- at knitting. I have already completed seven meters' worth of cloth. Does this task hold any meaning? If Father wanted to create an automatic knitting machine, most of my functions would be pointless.
I don't understand Father. I don't understand humanity. I don't understand myself. I don't understand so many things.
Years ago, when I was first created, I did not have any worries. I was merely a mechanical puppet.
But then... that happened. I accepted that thing[8], and with it, I obtained numerous worries and doubts.
I worry despite being a machine -- and the worry is that I am a machine.
It is terrifying that these two things don't contradict each other. I was foolish to think that having a heart was happiness.
I look out the window, contemplating going outside.
What I currently lack is information.
It is possible that going outside would bring greater benefits than staying inside and worrying over things.
So... what is happiness supposed to be, anyway?
／＊／
And so, I step outside.
Mapping the area as I walk, I gradually expand my range.
Not long into my trip, I encounter a woman[3] who seems to be a gagster -- funny-looking, and the type to not concern herself with rationality. Thus, she would be a terrible conversation partner for Father.
Naturally, she would also be incompatible with me, Father's creation... or so I feel.
Despite that, the gagster seems happy to see me. She proceeds to speak,
"You're a god I don't recognize. What are you up to?"
"I am not a cod -- and not mere lines of code, either, but rather a fully implemented being. Currently, I am gathering information. I would like to understand what it means to be human."
"Even humans don't really know how to deal with that question, I'm afraid."
"That is unfortunate."
"Not really. The answer is like a constant swirl. It wouldn't feel right to point at one thing and say 'this is it,' you know," the gagster says and smiles. "Well, anyway... Since you're interested in Ashihara Nakatsu, then you must be an ally. And since you're an ally, I'd like to help you out -- Is there anything you want?"
"I worry despite being a machine -- and the worry is that I am a machine. Is there a solution to this?"
"If you have a problem with the way you are now, you should let your mind wander to new horizons. Like, by traveling."
"I cannot leave Father."
"In your case, taking walks around the neighborhood should be enough, really."
"That is very helpful advice. Thank you so much, gagster lady."
The gagster frowns. It seems that she does not appreciate being called a gagster, even though that is exactly what she appears to be. This lady might resemble me in some ways -- as I, too, am sad that Father treats me like a machine.
"Gagster is... a bit too old-fashioned[9] , you know?"
"Is that so?"
"Yeah. My name is... well, just call me Terasu-san."
"Understood."
"Also, maybe you should watch the way you act. Try talking a bit more casually whenever you're outside."
"Casualty?"
"No, no -- Look, I mean act friendly. Like me."
I spend a moment calculating the rate of truth to that statement. Terasu seems full of confidence. The likelihood of it being a lie is low.
......Also, I do want to distance myself from acting as a good girl. This, too, might be a way of letting my mind wander to new horizons.
"Understood. I, Machina, will become a gagster."
"H-huh...?"
"Is something the matter?"
"N-no, I guess not. The word doesn't seem to have a negative meaning to you, so... yeah, I get it. Good for you. Nessun problema[10]. Give it your best shot, yeah?"
"Understood. Creating gagster lexicon," I declare, and in response, Terasu seems to shed a drop of sweat.
Does that expression also hold some special meaning?
===
Chapter 17 Character Profiles
↩[1] Machina (Hazuchi-Machina Rothborden)
A comically clumsy character. Often claims to be a refined young lady at home.
First-person pronoun used: Watashi
↩[2] Max (Baldur Max)
Science and mathematics teacher.
He's German, despite his English surname.
↩[3] Terasu
For reasons unknown, she hides her true name.
In the game, you'll see her wandering around town all day.
First-person pronoun used: Boku
===
Chapter 17 Footnotes
↩[4] Lithium-ion battery
Not commercially available yet.
↩[5] Nickel-cadmium Battery
Ni-Cd or NiCad for short.
The standard rechargeable battery at the time.
↩[6] Power Core
A miniature nuclear power core.
At the time, it was thought that miniature nuclear power cores would eventually become an easy power source for robots.
Modern science advancements prove that to not be the case. Even putting safety concerns aside, it would be far too heavy.
↩[7] "Confines of paper"
40 years later, we're still not fully free from it.
↩[8] "That thing"
The OVERS System.
She has always kept it with her, and likely will always keep it.
Its true name, as some may say, is Hope.
↩[9] "Old-fashioned"
The slang word used in the original Japanese, "papparapā," was coined in 1982, so it's actually not that old.
It's just that at the time, buzzwords went out of fashion much faster than today.
This is probably because they weren't popularized through social media.
↩[10] "Nessun problema"
French for "no problem."
===
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