The End - Shouta - June [Part 1 of 2]
The one who proposed that we went to the baseball field was none other than Yokoyama.
Our catcher, one who usually would give up right after being declined with one shake of the head, was uncharacteristically stubborn for just today; he dragged all of the third years along to sneak into the field late at night.
"Well then, let us commence the Jousei High School Baseball Club Retirement Ceremony. Salutations."
As if Yokoyama's opening speech was a cue, four third-year students, all empty-handed, shuffled into their positions. At the shortstop was Sasai, in jeans; running to the center field was Okamoto, in a sleeveless shirt; and stepping on to the pitcher's mound was me, in sandals.
"First, Catcher, Yokoyama-kun."
Yokoyama, in shorts, called read out his own name, then got in the batter's box. Pretending to grip his bat firmly, he then swung at the air.
"Bring it, Ogawa!"
Yokoyama thrusted his finger, pointing at a spot above Okamoto, at just about around the Murai Clinic sign. Looks like an announcement that he's going for a home run. I sent a signal of denial to the imaginary catcher twice, then raised my right hand that I pretended to hold a ball with, then swung the arm with all my strength. The course was perfect. However,
"KAKI~~N!"
Yokoyama's swing, which should have completely missed its mark, caught my winning pitch in dead center, easily sending it flying to the upper tier of the stands, between the left and center fielders.
"How 'bout that, Ogawa? I hit it over the electronic scoreboard!"
To correct him, it was out of the field; a home run.
"Alright, I'm up next. Second, Shortstop, Sasai-kun. It's a challenge, Ogawa!"
Sasai hurried from the shortstop and knocked my full-power straight pitch, knocking it leftwards off the field. Then came Okamoto, who easily knocked my pitch rightwards off the field.
It's all me who was faced with the nightmare of giving away three home runs in a row.
"Alright, next up is Shouta. C'mon, c'mon, bring it on, Public Pitcher. I'll show you the power of the Monster Rookie!"
I cornered Okamoto, who played the role of Kawakita, by racking up three strikes on him, and then another three by pitching knuckleballs.
"A~ah... So hot, so tired~~"
While wiping the sweat off his forehead, Sasai threw himself down in the middle of the baseball diamond.
"Man~ I thought it looked stupid at first, but it's pretty damn fun once you actually to do it."
"Yeah, we even did it another four times. I totally understand how our Senpais felt now."
Okamoto nodded as he laid down on his back beside Sasai. Sasai slapped my ankle, as if telling me to lay myself down as well.
"See, didn't I say it'll be great? The Retirement Ceremony, I mean."
I laid myself down, and lying next to me was Yokoyama, arms and legs outstretched like a starfish.
That's right, that was the Retirement Ceremony, a tradition passed down in the Jousei High School Baseball Club. The third-years who are about to retire from the club are to gather in the field at night, then play air baseball while impersonating the team that drove them to retirement. A little ritual for us, an unremarkable team of an unremarkable school.
Well, I'm calling it a field, but it's actually just an ordinary fenced school yard, with no mound nor bases. And the drainage is so awful that when it rains, the water would well up like a river. Every day in this yard is a turf war, with us against the other clubs like the soccer team or the volleyball team. But even so, we continued pursuing the path of the white ball with all our hearts.
"They were real tough, huh... Hayami Commerce..."
"Koshien seems so far away..."
To Sasai's mutters, Okamoto muttered in response.
[WE'RE GOING TO KOSHIEN!]
One sudden day, our manager excitedly wrote as such on the club room's walls with black ink. Although no one in the club took those words seriously, there was also no one who dared to erase them off, even though they could be easily rubbed off with some water.
And so, from that day on, they became somewhat of a buzzword among the members.
Things like, "Hey, push it! You're going to Koshien, right!?" or "Hey, hey! You're going to Koshien with those sloppy skills!?"; jokes that would make one feel embarrassed and itchy on the inside. But even so, those words would build up more and more heat each time they have been said, and before we even realized, it became an inextinguishable flame in our hearts.
"C'mon, we did great. Stopped the Hayami from getting a called game, you know."
"That's right. It's all thanks to our Captain here. Yeah, Ace?"
Oh, shut it-- Was what I intended to communicate as I jokingly kicked Okamoto at his foot.
"Still, I really wanted to go... To Koshien..."
"Koshien, the Promised Land, huh..."
To another one of Sasai's grumbles, Okamoto muttered once again in response.
"Sorry."
Yokoyama said in a whisper which only I could her.
Oh c'mon, don't say that-- I knocked on my right-hand man's shoulder with my left fist. I intended to encourage him, but Yokoyama stayed silent. Maybe I used the wrong hand? I've never been good at being considerate, too...
For a while, we lied down on the field, spending the time in silence. Each one of us reminisced about our past three years, picturing them on the night sky.
Koshien, the Promised Land... It's not that I was looking to be promised such a definite thing. All I wanted was...
Right then--
"Hey! What do you think you're doing there!?"
A shout of anger echoed through the field.
Oh crap, it's a teacher-- thought no one ever. Our school doesn't have any guards on night shift, and the voice wasn't even that of an adult.
"Me~h, what killjoys. Could anyone at least pretend to be surprised?"
That forced deep voice was so ridiculous that it even sounded cute.
"But seriously, y'all really did that... That ritual."
Not at all successful in her prank, the short-haired girl in shorts dragged her heels toward us.
"Anyways, please be more mindful of laying waste to the field. It's us second-years who did the clean-ups, you know."
Urahara Mei kicked down her bicycle's stand, put her hands on her hips, then knit her brows, in a demeanor befitting her nickname of Demon Manager.
...That's coming you, who brought a bicycle down to the field? Her stance was so daunting that no one dared to give such a retort.
"Dammit. That's dirty, Ogawa! Placing landmines on the batter's box 'cause you can't beat me... But I won't lose! I'll hit them off the field, no matter how many you throw at me!"
Sasai stood in the batter's box, panting heavily, seeming half-dead.
"...Don't you feel empty on the inside at all, doing things like this?"
Leaning on a horizontal metal bar, Mei directed a cold gaze at the other three, who were still playing air baseball.
"You'd think we do if you're just watching. It's surprisingly addicting once you get to try it."
I answered, while fluttering my T-shirt's collar to let air in.
"That was unexpected."
"Huh?"
As our eyes met, Mei promptly turned away.
"Well, you don't really give off the impression that you'd do something like this, Senpai. Unlike the other three."
"Impression?"
"How should I say it... Well... you're cool and all."
"Cool, huh."
"What're you laughing at?"
"No I wasn't."
Without leaving a pause open, Mei took a glance at me. I hurriedly looked up at the sky, so as to not let her see the grin painted on my face. The rainy season's clouds further darkened the already dark sky. The night breeze, packed with June's humidity, did nothing to help dry our sweaty bodies, but rather soaked them up even more. But strangely, I didn't feel hot at all. Perhaps this year's summer won't be hot either. Or, by any chance, for the rest of my life...
"So, your baseball career is over..."
Mei suddenly spoke up.
"Sure did."
"You're going to University, right, Takamura-senpai?"
"...Yeah."
--Takamura. Every underclassman would just call me Shouta-senpai, except Mei, who's too stubborn to stop calling me by my family name no matter how many times I told her to.
"You're awesome, Senpai. Being able to balance your studies and club activities. You don't even go to cram school, right?"
"No time for that, you see. Since I'm also doing club, mail tutoring service is the most I can take."
"I can't even deal with one thing at a time, really."
"It's not like I'm having an easy time here either, you know."
"Please-fully-concentrate-on-your-studies-from-now-on."
What's with the monotone recitation? Mei's face had no suggestion whatsoever that she's prepared to cheer anyone on. She poked her index finger under the damp earth, dug up a pebble, then proceeded to turn over the soil under her feet.
"I'm going to be direct; I wasn't cheering for you on your studies at all, Senpai."
Nope, that was quite a detour right there.
"I'd thought you would keep on playing baseball, you see."
"By keep on playing, you mean until fall?"
"No. Forever, and ever, and ever."
Forever...?
"Hy~yup."
Mei suddenly stood up, then flung the pebble away with all her might. From the soccer club's weather-beaten goal post at the opposite side of the field, a dry noise resounded.
"Say that it's your way to study for the exams, go crazy at the fall season games, get into a university by recommendation, then conquer the Big 6."
"The Big 6, huh."
"Not only that. Rank in the top three in the draft and go pro, get discouraged by all the difficulties during the first professional year, then switch to being a curveball pitcher in the second. Enter the rotation in the third, go on to be the winning pitcher two times in a row during the fourth to the sixth, then blast off to the Major League after you've done all you can in the seventh!"
While she was saying that, Mei must have been excited as if it was definitely going to happen. She sprang up and held on to the metal bar.
"Even Major, huh?"
"You're laughing again."
With what you're saying, of course I am.
"Takamura-senpai."
"I mean-- sorry. It looks like you've been more serious than even me when it comes to my baseball career, Mei."
"Huh? W-- Well, of course. I'm the manager girl, after all."
Mei, seemingly embarrassed, wobbled as she dangled on the metal bar.
"I just like to think about that kind of thing. Like, it makes me feel all fired up, you see."
...You know, it looks like you have a lot of talent in air baseball.
"Don't you think about those kinds of things at all, Senpai? Like, what if you got to step up the Koshien mound, or what if your name was on the draft?"
"Nope, I don't."
"You're lying. You must've thought about them at least once. Please come clean."
"I really don't."
"If you plan on playing dumb, I'll give you an O-Guruma throw followed by a dropkick."
"Stop it already."
In this case, Mei could actually do it. And that's what makes it scary.
"Now, now, spit them all out~~ Your shameful delusions, Senpai~~ It's throw and a dropkick if you don't~~ Right at your neck~~"
Mei grinned widely as she got into stance, ready for an O-Guruma throw.
"Hey, I wasn't lying. I really never thought about those things. I've never had any kind of clear goal when playing baseball, you see. In the end, I'm still not sure why I was playing baseball, even."
"...What's wrong with you?"
Mei suddenly froze in place.
...I said too much. I regretted it, but it was too late.
"Nothing. Nothing to be curious about."
"Of course I'm curious. Tell me about it, Takamura-senpai."
"It's not that big of a deal, really."
"That's for me to judge."
Dodging questions never works when faced with the Demon Manager, the pride and joy of the Jousei High School Baseball Club. Dangling from the metal bar, Mei kept still as she stared down at me.
"Uh, well, I'm not sure how I should say it..."
I have no confidence that I'll be able to convey it well, but as things are, I'll probably get sent flying for real, so for now I'll just say what words I can put together.
"The reason I started playing baseball in the first place was to fill a gap, you see."
"Gap...?"
Looks like I got it wrong right from the start. Mei now has a stern expression on her face.
"Uh-- Calling it a gap might be exaggerating, but I used to be really shy, you see. I was always holed up at home. I was really bad at holding conversations, and also at communicating my emotions over..."
"Not like you're that good at it now though."
Mei said, still dangling from the metal bar.
"Probably, yeah. So, my old man was worried about me, so he took me outside and taught me to play baseball."
Even now, I remember it clearly. The small park behind my apartment. My baseball career began there.
"And so baseball opened up a whole new world for me, just as my old man planned. And I ended up liking baseball. But if you're asking if I've been keeping at it just because I like it, I have a feeling that it's not... I'm not even sure what it actually is. You might get angry at me for saying this, but I've given up on Koshien the moment I entered a public school. What I wanted wasn't that kind of thing, but..."
Something that's out there, far away. It's because I wanted to know what it is-- and to see for certain-- I recklessly kept on pitching. Something in a faraway place, that I've never seen yet know very well. I'm sure it is...
"...Sorry, I just can't say it right. Just forget it."
"No way."
Mei dropped herself down from the metal bar.
"Mei?"
I called out her name to check if she was fine, since I thought I hallucinated for a moment that she was being possessed by a different person. Her voice turned so... heavy... and stiff...
"There's no way I can just forget it."
I've never heard her voice shiver like that before.
"I might get angry, you said... That's what someone who doesn't want others to get angry at him says, right? But I'm going to get angry."
"What's wrong, Mei?"
"Don't 'what's wrong?' me. What's wrong with you, Senpai? Given up on Koshien? Don't know why you're playing baseball? Why're you saying all that now?"
The shivering in her voice gradually became more prominent. It spread from her lips to her shoulders, then from her shoulders to her fingertips. Noticing that Mei was acting unusual, Yokoyama and the others stopped their game of air baseball and looked our way.
"I've never wanted you to say things like that, Senpai. You're the one who I-- who we all looked up to! You were better than anyone, practiced harder than anyone, liked baseball more than anyone-- Takamura-senpai, it was because you were our captain that we were able to come this far!"
"Wait, Mei. That's not it-- What I wanted to say was..."
"I'm going home."
Mei jumped on her bicycle.
"Senpai... You losing pitcher!"
That was supposed to be nuanced, like a dejected loser or something, I guess? Throwing out that mysterious insult, Mei took off at full speed.
"Wait, Mei--"
Ignoring my call for her to stop, Mei blasted off, kicking up a cloud of dust,
"Kyah--!"
Then, a few seconds later, an unidentifiable sound of a collision echoed.
"He~y, Urahara crashed into the school fence! You alright there, Urahara?"
--RING RING
Looks like she's fine, more or less. Answering Sasai's call with her bicycle's bell, Mei then left just like that, riding into the nocturnal town.
"Hey, Shouta. What's up with Urahara?"
Yokoyama jogged to me, his gigantic body shaking.
"Looks like I made her pretty angry."
"What? What's even up with that? After all I did... What'd you say to Mei, man?"
"Hell if I know..."
I don't really know, but it looks like I'm still pretty bad at conveying my emotions to people, just like Mei said.
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